In the preparation for our presentation of gender roles we had some amazing conversations about gender, roles, impact, and shifts in gender roles. We discussed whether children are setup from day one with the expectation to conform to an unwritten set of rules. We discussed if the gender of siblings and birth order had any impact on the gender roles of a child? What I ultimately discovered is that gender is impacted by everything and everything is impacted by gender. Girls with older brothers and boys with older sisters are different than sibling with the same gender. Why? I’m still not sure if it is the exposure to different toys or just exposure to a different gender?
I cannot think of a topic without relating it to gender and that was our biggest struggle as a group. Finding a good mix of topics and conversations that we could contain and keep within a range. Gender is one of those topics that can be seen in everything. Do more people turn out for a girls’ basketball game than a boys’ basketball game? Why? Do jobs become careers when they are held by men? Why are cooks women and chefs men? Why is it okay for men to ride motorcycles, but not women? Why is it the woman’s responsibility to prepare dinner? Everywhere you turn you can see an issue containing gender.
What I learned from this presentation was how to take my observation of gender and pull it apart to decipher the impact. How will this impact a student? How can I make this student feel included when an issue of gender is in the way? This could be anything from have same sex parents to having a female student from a culture that doesn’t hold her in high esteem. How will I as a person who was raised with the idea of equality and pride in working women deal with issue of gender? Do I conform to the ideas within the culture to make the student feel comfortable? Or do I educate and allow the student to discover other options with the understanding that they may feel alienated? These are the issues that I feel I will always struggle with. I’m not a person who has to be all or nothing, but how do I gently rock the boat without sinking the ship?
Gender is an issue that will never go away and will manifest itself in many ways. I am interested to the see what future generations will fight for for their boys and girls. The roles are constantly shifting and changing. Right now there seems to be a big shift to men as the “stay at home” parent. As a teacher I will need to be sure that I support all families and children, while staying current with gender trends. Especially as the roles shift into territory that is not the “standard.”
"I’m not a person who has to be all or nothing, but how do I gently rock the boat without sinking the ship?"
ReplyDeleteBrilliant and poetic use of metaphor. Careful though - if you don't watch out your writing will start to look like mine.
You worked with me on gender, so you know how much I truly dig the topic. As one of that new breed of gender role twisting stay@home dads, I will answer the question like this:
I think this is an issue of morality far more than it is an issue of fairness. Females in this world deserve a far better shake than they have been given.
That being so, maybe it isn't enough for us to gently rock that boat. Maybe we need to stand up in the bow, raise our arms and voices and tip the sucker over. That splash of hypothermia inducing water might just be what it takes to wake people up.
While it may seem a brutal reality, if kids are indoctrinated into our gender caste system from day one, then they unfortunately are as involved as the rest of us. My hope is that they will have the courage to climb back into the boat with a new perspective on things.
As per our conversation:
ReplyDeleteWell said. I couldn’t agree more. The challenges of a collective culture vs. our individual one do present and interesting dilemma. Although, it could be argued that our culture restricts women just as much as a collective one, we just do it less directly. We are more subversive and insidious. We like to give false hope.
However, as you stated, you are a good example for that not being the case. You, like the rest of the women in our group, are exceptional. So, the question I would pose for you and the rest of the “amazing” women (and we equally “amazing” men) in our group is this: When do we take that risk of perhaps alienating a student or causing potential strife with parents when it will benefit the greater good? When we know that something being done is not the correct moral choice when do we intercede? Are cultural habits immune from scrutiny? Just because your culture has always done something doesn’t make it right in the progressive world we strive to create.
I think this is at the root of what we are asking. Can we be both culturally sensitive and brave enough to stand up and say “enough is enough; this is not the world we are going to live in”?
How on earth do we do this?